The old Cynical Gamer articles. What an interesting collection of articles that may or may not still have relevance today. Step back in time, and see what is or was on my mind.
[img width=200 align=right]http://www.rfgeneration.com/images/repository/57026936647e82160480ffcg3.jpg[/img]Nintendo! What the hell is wrong with you? Words can describe how frustrated you make me. It's times like today where I wish that you went the way of Sega. You know how to print money for yourself, but in terms of catering to everyone, you've failed. I remember how you said that you wanted to cater to everyone, but now it's obvious that was a crock of shit. Kudos to you Nintendo, we love the shovelware that you promote.
Get this Nintendo - a large population of Wii owners are actually above the age of 18! We're sick of the "Protect the Kids Bullshit!" Microsoft does a great job protecting the kids while at the same time providing the best online experience of any console. You, on the other hand, are so preoccupied with "protecting the kids" that you neglect the potential sales and desires of your older owners. It pisses us off, and we hate it.
I don't want Carnival Games. I want more games like No More Heroes. I don't want Smash Bros with Friend Codes. I want Smash Bros with Live. I don't want the PS2 version of Rock Band; I want the full fledged version that the 360 and PS3 has. Perhaps you don't realize it Nintendo, but what you're doing now is pissing people like me off because your policies promote developers to port CRAP! I'm sick of this crap, and I am getting rather sick of you.
So Nintendo, what's your deal? Do you really wish to have the entire market, or do you wish to pawn the true gamers off on some other console maker who cares about us? It seems as though you're too preoccupied with promoting kid's games, shovelware, and games for grannies that you've totally forgotten about us. That's cool. Soon enough, we'll forget about you, too.
I'm starting to see why people's Wiis are collecting dust. With the way you're acting, Nintendo, mine will be as well. I'm really starting to hate what you've become, and I know I am not alone. You're not the Nintendo I used to love. You're the Nintendo who only cares about pushing sales at the expense of your old loyal populous. Such things make us jaded, you know. Spiteful, hateful. Sony consumers. Microsoft consumers.
You keep doing what you're doing Nintendo. Grow your market share, do what you want, but keep in mind what you're doing in the process. You're neglecting people like me, and we just can't sit here watching you defecate over your old, loyal fan base. The time of die hard Nintendo fans is waning, and in the process, you're losing some of your most vocal advertisers, us.
Great job Nintendo, great job.
[img width=250 align=right]http://www.rfgeneration.com/images/repository/15473647647d219cde4f28CynicalEA.jpg[/img]Maxis was a great company. Who didn't love SimCity 2000? Certainly, it's no Stunt Driver, but boy was the game fun. Could you get the Launch Arcos to actually launch? I couldn't. I suck. But hey, at least I could start major floods like the best SimCity players. Floods are something that all the new SimCity games surely miss. Bring them back Maxis. I beg you. Maxis was certainly a great company. Today, however, it is part of the behemoth known as EA. Sure, they still have reign to make potentially amazing games such as Spore, but let's look at the other, unfortunate studios. Take for example Westwood Studios, the original developer of the hugely successful Command and Conquer Series. Red Alert" quality game. Red Alert 2" also a quality game. So you'd think a studio with a series as successful as Command and Conquer would have been allowed to survive, right? Well, you'd be wrong. Instead EA ate them. No more. Completely assimilated. That's apparently what you get for screwing up on an offshoot of your major franchise. Thanks C&C Renegade. So, there went Westwood, and other studios have seen similar fates, becoming less autonomous and on occasion just not existing anymore. Bullfrog? What's that? They've been gone for a while.
EA likes to buy companies. In the past, they would assimilate the companies, but recently their CEO mentioned that this model just was not a good idea. Of course, this statement was made right around the acquisition of a high profile developer. You may know them as Bioware. They make good games. Most recently they released Mass Effect, and before that they had hits such as Jade Empire and Neverwinter Nights. Hugely successful. Congrats to them. But you got to wonder, will their success keep them from becoming a footnote in EA's corporate history? Sure, EA says that assimilation is a bad thing, but was that just said to placate the masses of people who find Bioware to be the be all end all of developers? (I'm looking at you, Tan) History shows they have no problem making developers part of the bigger EA. So, is that fate subject to Bioware? What could it take? A bad game? A whim of the CEO? Nothing? Who knows? But what I do know is that I'd take Mr. Riccitiello's comments with a grain of salt. It might make a future assimilation even more stinging than it should be.
So, why am I writing this article? Is it because there is a Blizzard Warning out right now and I am cooped up in the house, or is it because EA is trying to become ultra-mega EA upon the purchase of either Take Two or perhaps Ubisoft. Maybe it's both. But yeah, doesn't EA's Grand Theft Auto sound delightfully evil? The Evil Publisher, with what is considered by some to be the devil's game. How delightfully maniacal. Damn you EA for owning Maxis. You'll get my money for that. But, will you or will you not keep your future and new acquisitions autonomous? I certainly hope that you do, but at the same time I certainly will not keep my hopes up.
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