Greetings! By the time this is up, it should be Christmas Day proper, so here it goes;
Imagine my surprise when I opened my mail and found a box from Limited Run! Wait a minute, I thought, I'm not expecting any Limited Run orders until at least 2027, so what is this mystery?
Bwa-ha! After checking the label, I recognized the witness protection name for our own Crabmaster 2000!
[img width=350 height=467]https://i.imgur.com/9b7QSer.jpg[/img]
Clever ploy, Crabby, clever ploy. Well, time to unwrap some gold, frankincense, and myrrh!
[img width=350 height=467]https://i.imgur.com/wNyf1B3.jpg[/img]
First off, we have a delicious holiday staple belonging under every tree and inside every stocking, for those of us who strangely dangle footwear precariously near open flames. Anyway, can't go wrong here.
[img width=350 height=467]https://i.imgur.com/Fevvmnp.jpg[/img]
Next we have a classic troll by Mr. Crabmaster. With a name like that, even in this economy one would assume the ability to secure a nice selection of seafood, but here we have... cat food. Or as my Beloved likes to call it, a fine sandwich ingredient. It will be used and appreciated regardless.
-Footnote- Do NOT combine these ingredients into a holiday casserole. Turns out there are worse foods than fruitcake and figgy pudding. Onward!
[img width=350 height=467]https://i.imgur.com/wfjUnux.jpg[/img]
Here we have the first of two included games. To complete Mr. Crabmaster2000's epic troll on my account, we must discuss a little history; it is a little known fact that many, many years ago Crabby and I exchanged several emails where we discussed my Christian faith and his... er, not. Now these many years later I see Crabby has taken advantage of our Secret Santa program to give me a little poke. While it would go unnoticed to others, I am of course reminded of the War On Christmas and how heathens commonly replace "Christ" with an "X" in the word Christmas, spelling it XMas, in the obvious pursuit of taking Christ out of Christmas, and not at all because it is shorter and easier to display, based off the Greek letter 'Chi' as a known shorthand for Christ, or that the form of this abbreviation has been used by Christians for centuries. Nope, pretty sure it is the 'take Christ out' thing.
Anyway, I see the sleight of hand Crabby is doing here, because as you can see, he is attempting to take the Christ out of... em, Christ-enoblade! Nice try, Crabmaster, but I will be appreciating your kind gift of Xenobla- er, I mean, Christ-enoblade the way it was surely enjoyed two thousand years ago.
Finally, all of Crabmaster's ribbing is forgiven, for he has sent what we all know at RFGeneration as the holy grail of NES collecting; the one, the only... I... I can't even say the name, for fear some algorithm will pick up the title and I will risk alerting the collecting community I am now in possession of such a valuable item, risking someone may begin a plot to break in and snatch this priceless treasure.
[img width=350 height=467]https://i.imgur.com/CQ8T1Ky.jpg[/img]
Naturally I will be contacting the proper grading organizations and securing a vacuum-sealed EMP-resistant vault in which to preserve this precious pinnacle of electronic entertainment. In thousands of years, intrepid archaeologists will undoubtedly reach the earth high and low for the chance to open a treasure-chest containing this masterpiece.
Do not fret for me, fellow gamers. For while it is best that I preserve this grandest of gifts, many years ago another RFGener going by the moniker Jerry Greenwood must have once been told of this greatness, and he created a brilliant piece of art (undoubtedly from the descriptions and stories of this magnificent artifact.) Whenever I wish to be reminded of Crabmaster's great sacrifice, I shall gaze longingly at this generous visage Mr Greenwood replicated, and I will be reminded of the gift I have steeled away for future generations.
[img width=400 height=467]https://i.imgur.com/y8Qa5q6.jpg[/img]
Thus concludes this year's Secret Santa stash. In all sincerity, thanks a ton to Crabby and the RFGen community! Merry Christmas, Happy New Year, God Bless, and Game On!
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