Today in the mail, I got a package from everyone's favorite console maker, Nintendo. Enclosed in the package were four of their new (undoubtedly court mandated) silicone Wii Remote Jackets. Now if you didn't know, because people are still morons with their Wii Remotes and throw them around like they are spears, Nintendo had to step in yet again to help save people from themselves with the all-new Wii Remote Jacket.
[img width=250 height=188]http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v221/Tondog/wiimotejacket/jacketfront.jpg[/img][img width=250 height=188]http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v221/Tondog/wiimotejacket/jacketside.jpg[/img][img width=250 height=188]http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v221/Tondog/wiimotejacket/jacketback.jpg[/img]
However all is not well in the world of Nintendo. The Wii Remote Jacket has some serious issues.
First off, the new jackets cover up damn near half of the IR sensor on the front of the Wii Remote.
[img width=250 height=188]http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v221/Tondog/wiimotejacket/wiimotesensor.jpg[/img][img width=250 height=188]http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v221/Tondog/wiimotejacket/wiimotejacketsensor.jpg[/img]
This is not a major problem, but based on my observations in the sensitivity adjustment area of the Wii, when you have a low sensitivity and are a fair distance from the "sensor bar," having the jacket on the Wiimote will affect how well the signal from the sensor bar is read. However, if your sensitivity is adjusted properly, I found that there was no difference in the readings. A test run on Resident Evil 4: Wii Edition confirmed my findings, as it played the same with and without the jacket on.
Also, like any of the other third party Wii Remote Jackets, changing the batteries becomes a nightmare. However, it is less of a nightmare compared to the the third party ones I've used (thanks OatBob), as the official one slides onto the Wii Remote very efficiently and with very little effort. However, it still is very annoying.
But the worst thing about the remote jackets is what they do to your Wii Remote. They basically turn it into a even more of a dildo than it already was, giving people like
even more fuel to their beliefs.
Want proof of how horrible the jackets look on the Wii Remote? Consult the following comparison:
[img width=250 height=188]http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v221/Tondog/wiimotejacket/wiimotenojacket.jpg[/img][img width=250 height=188]http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v221/Tondog/wiimotejacket/wiimoteandjacket.jpg[/img]
[img width=250 height=188]http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v221/Tondog/wiimotejacket/wiimoteandjacketside.jpg[/img][img width=250 height=188]http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v221/Tondog/wiimotejacket/wiimoteandjacketback.jpg[/img]
Notice how the normal Wii Remote on the left hand side looks like a regular old remote, but the one on the right hand side looks like it is some kinky sex toy your girlfriend might enjoy (just add
this program and you'll be set). Also notice, it is ribbed for her pleasure!! This new jacket is a first step towards
this and this
this (both links=NSFW).
However, as much as I think the new Lawsuit Preventing Wii Jackets are a lame idea overall, I do like a few things about it. First, it's pretty comfortable to hold and doesn't affect the feel of the remote too much. But if you are like me and get sweaty palms while playing games, it will feel slippery while using it. Second, they are padded pretty well to prevent a TV breakage, but I still think that you could break a TV even with it on if the remote flys with enough force. Third, I like that they used a decent amount of silicone. That will cause a shortage of silicone, thus not as many people will be getting breat implants. NATURAL BOOBIES FTW! Also, the built in cover for the accessory port is a very nice thing and should have been on the Wiimote from the get-go.
[img width=250 height=188]http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v221/Tondog/wiimotejacket/wiimoteacccoveropen.jpg[/img][img width=250 height=188]http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v221/Tondog/wiimotejacket/wiimoteacccover.jpg[/img]
That about wraps up my look at the new Wii Remote Jackets. If you want to get them, all you need to do is go to
http://www.nintendo.com/c.../jacket/jacketrequest.jsp and you can order up to four of them for free. It should take less than two weeks from the time you order them to the time it shows up in your mailbox. Also, for our friends in Canada (aka: Tan), this offer is open to you as well. Free Wiimote Condoms for all! Isn't Nintendo wonderful?
