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Last time, our heroes uncovered the truth! The Grinch, wanting revenge, set up this whole thing in an effort to get said revenge! The Grinch, having been found out, made an attempt to escape! Will he succeed, or will he be caught?! Find out now, on the epic conclusion!
(Two Lawyers are seen walking down the hall)
Lawyer A: I got those documents, but the boss wants them today.
Lawyer B: Oh, is that gonna give us enough time to cross check the--
Grinch: Outta my way! (Pushes them both aside)
Lawyer A: Ow! What the--
Redd: Get back here before I rip off your -Bleep- and feed them to my dog!
Bickman: Stop that son of a...! (Trips over Lawyer B)
Lawyer B: OUCH!
Bickman: Sorry! (Continues running)
Grinch: (Runs outside) You'll never catch me you fools! (Climbs up a building's walls)
Zagnorch: The hell?! Your not allowed to do that!
Izret: I got this! (Whips out Jetpack)
Slackur: Where did THAT come from?!
Izret: I got it from Scorpion. (Flies upwards)
Grinch: Crap! (Busts through window into building)
Izret: (Follows after him)
Grinch: Watch that first step Izret! It's a doozy!
Izret: OW! Toe toe toe toe! Ow!
(Woman screams)
Grinch: Ohh, sorry lady! Didn't see a thing!
(Glass breaking)
Grinch: (Jumps out of window onto another building)
Izret: Damn it!
Slackur: He's mine! (Runs inside building)
Grinch: Ha ha ha! What'cha gonna do now, punk?!
(Door opens)
Grinch: What the?!
Slackur: Nowhere left to run, jerk!
Grinch: Bah! You won't beat me again!
Slackur: I'm the Matrix! (Assumes Kung-Fu Stance)
Zagnorch: (Looks up) This is gonna be so awesome. (Smiles)
Evil Santa: Not so fast!
Bickman: Not you again!
Shadow: What do you want now?!
Evil Santa: I'm gonna knock you all down!
Redd: Not if I knock you down first, asshole!
Evil Santa: And how do you expect to stop me?! I have Evil Christmas Magic! I can UNMAKE you!
Redd: .........No you don't!
Evil Santa: .......You win THIS round, McKnight. But! I'm still stronger than you!
Redd: Prove it, you -Bleep-! Come at me!
Evil Santa: (Begins focusing strength)
Redd: Uh-oh...
Bickman: Great! Now this fat jerk is gonna kill us!
(Suddenly, a shout is heard from behind Evil Santa)
 ?: Endoukuken!!
(An Energy Ball hits Evil Santa)
Evil Santa: Yowch!! (Turns around) You?!
Redd: Jago!
Jago: I'm afraid your path ends here, Evil Santa.
Evil Santa: You wouldn't kill me! .....Would you?
Jago: I'm not going to kill you.
Evil Santa: (Sighs)
Jago: Redd is.
Evil Santa: Wait! Let's talk about this!
Redd: You tried to get me and my friends thrown in Jail on bogus charges, asshole! There's nothing to talk about! Your a dead man!
Evil Santa: Wait! I can give you money!
Redd: Pfffft. (Rears fist back)
Evil Santa: NOOOOOOOOO--
(The Grinch falls on top of him)
Bickman: What the...?
(Everyone looks up)
Slackur: I got him!
Zagnorch: Yeah, we kind of figured that out.
Shadow: You literally killed two birds with one stone.
Slackur: (Looks down) Oops...
Redd: Oh, well. Who wants some Eggnog? I'm buying.
Bickman: I'm game.
Jago: Mind if I come along?
Redd: Not at all.
(Later that night)
Izret: Ugh...I never want to hear the name "Santa" again.
Shadow: Your not alone in that.
Redd: (Sighs) I'm hungry.
Bickman: Redd, weren't you getting ready to tell us a Christmas Story before this whole thing started?
Redd: Yeah, but I think I'll save it. Besides, this will make a good story for our kids.
Zagnorch: True that.
Redd: Right then...from all of us here at RFGeneration, we wish you a Merry Christmas, Happy Holidays, and a very Happy New Year!
Thanks for reading this huge 4-Part Blog Entry of mine. I hope I could make you laugh a little, and brighten up your holidays, should stress be kicking in, as it usually does this time of year.
DISCLAIMER: Forget it. Lost point, lost cause.
Last time, Miles Edgeworth called in a surprise witness who could supposedly implicate Bickman in stealing a Blue Corvette! Who is this witness?! Let's find out!
Bickman: This cannot be happening!
Miles: State your name and occupation for the court, sir.
Mario: It's a me, Mario! I'm a plumber!
Bickman: Why, Mario?! I've been your biggest fan for years!
Phoenix: Objection! The prosecution has put the witness up to this through Blackmail!
Judge: Where is the proof, Mr. Wright?
Phoenix: Ummmm........
Judge: Uh-huh.
Miles: Witness, tell the court what you saw.
Mario: I witnessed Bickman break the window of a Blue Corvette, jump through it, and hotwire the car. He then proceeded to drive off.
Redd: (Under his breath) These claims are bogus! We have to do something!
Zagnorch: (Under his breath) What can we do? And where is Slackur?
(Suddenly, Slackur bursts through the doors of the courtroom)
Slackur: Stop!!
Judge: What the...?
Slackur: Your honor! That witness is a phony!
Miles: You can't prove that!
Slackur: Yes I can! I can also prove that the Santa in this courtroom is a phony!
Judge: (Sigh) Get on with it then, the bar opens soon.
Slackur: It's true that I did sneak out of this room, but I did so for good reason. Look who I found tied up in the Janitor's closet!
(Santa and Mario walk into the room)
Zagnorch: Oh...
Shadow: My...
Redd: Science!!!
Zagnorch: ....Science?
Redd: Yeah, I say that because--
Zagnorch: Doh, forget it! What is this?!
Santa: This evil impostor locked me and Mario here up so that he could accuse these people of bogus crimes! And he was led to--
Evil Santa: Shut up!
Judge: Led to what?
Santa: He was led to do this by that Mario-Impostor, all for vengeance.
Redd: Vengeance for what? And who is he really?
Santa: (Uses his Christmas Magic to reveal the Impostor's identity)
Redd & Slackur: YOU?!
The Grinch: Pah! Yes, it's me!
Bickman: Holy shit!
Zagnorch: Redd WASN'T lying last year!
The Grinch: Ever since that day, I've been living out in the cold! They're little stunt of taking those presents ruined EVERYTHING! I stole those presents so that I could sell them to make end's meet! But when they took them back, I got evicted and have been out in the cold since then! I've been working hard all year to plot my revenge!
Redd: They weren't yours to begin with you thief!
The Grinch: So what?! Thievery makes the world go 'round!
Slackur: Your sick!
Zagnorch: Yeah, let's get him!
The Grinch: No way! I ain't going to jail! (Runs away)
Bickman: After him!
(They all chase after him)
The truth has come out! What will happen?! Will The Grinch escape our heroes' fury?! Will he be met with justice?! Why didn't Izret speak up this time?! Find out, in the exciting conclusion to this whole convoluted thing on December 24th!
Also, forget the Disclaimer. Seems to be a lost cause by this point.
Last time, our Heroes, the RF Gen Gang, were dragged against they're will to court to face judgement for some bogus crimes. Will they be able to get out of this mess? Find out now!
Shadow Kisuragi (Shadow): Your honor, my friends couldn't have done those things!
Judge: One more like that and I will hold you in contempt of Court, Mr. Kisuragi!
Shadow: Sorry...
Miles Edgeworth: Mr. McKnight, where were you on the night of June 21st, 1989?
Redd: Probably sleeping in a crib, you idiot! I was only 1!
Miles: That's no excuse!
Redd: What the hell is wrong with you?!
Judge: Order in the court! Defense, you will restrain your client's attitude!
Phoenix Wright: Redd, calm down. Let me work.
Redd: Tch. Fine. (Under his breath) -Bleep- Judge...
Judge: I heard that.
Redd: Shit...
Judge: Do you have anyone to call to the stand, Mr. Wright?
Phoenix: I do, your honor! The defense calls this completely credible person to the stand! (Signals someone from the crowd of people in the court-room)
(A rather large man approaches the stand)
Izret: Is that Jago from Killer Instinct?
Redd: Suddenly, I have a lot more faith that we will win. (Smiles)
Phoenix: State your name and occupation for the court, sir.
Jago: Jago. I am a Monk from Tibet.
Phoenix: How do you know my client and his friends?
Jago: Redd frequently chooses me to win his battles in Killer Instinct.
Phoenix: I see. Can you confirm his innocence in this case?
Jago: Absolutely. Redd is a heroic man who would not oppose the law without proper justification. Besides, he was with me having a soda last week, so he couldn't have done this.
Miles: But...didn't this happen 25 Years ago?
Jago: Redd would have been 1 back then. As such, it would be impossible. What's more, Evil Santa--
Santa: Hey!
Jago: --said this happened last week. I rest my case.
Redd: This is too awesome.
Judge: You may step down Mister...ummm...Jago.
Jago: (Steps down from stand)
Judge: Okay Mr. McKnight! It is clear that your innocent, so you are clear.
Redd: Yes!!
Judge: Next case?
Miles: Mr. 101, please approach the stand.
Izret: Sheesh...
Miles: Mr. 101, where were you 5 years ago, on the night of December 16th?
Izret: I was--
Miles: OBJECTION! Your lying!
Izret: I didn't even finish my--
Miles: Dut dut dut! Your lying!
Izret: .......
Phoenix: Your honor, if I may call a witness...
Judge: Call them, Mr. Wright.
Phoenix: Come here. (Signals another person)
(A man garbed in yellow gear approaches the stand)
Izret: What the...?
Phoenix: Name and occupation, sir?
Scorpion: Scorpion. I am a Ninja.
Phoenix: And can you verify that Mr. 101 did not commit the crime of murder?
Scorpion: Yes, because I killed Sub-Zero.
Phoenix: The defense rests.
Judge: Very well. Bailiff! Take this...Ninja...and throw him in Jail!
Scorpion: Ninja Vanish! (Vanishes)
Judge: Oh. Ummmm...Mr. 101, you are free to go.
Izret: Nice.
Judge: Mr. 2K! Approach the stand!
Bickman: Okay...
Redd: (Whispers to Zagnorch) Hey, where'd Slackur go?
Zagnorch: Good question.
Miles: Your honor, I have a witness who can confirm that Mr. 2K stole that car!
Judge: Very well. Call them in.
Miles: Witness! Come forth!
(Someone approaches Miles)
Bickman: No way...!!
Redd: Hooooo, boy...
Izret: Okay, now we're -Bleep-.
What surprise witness has Miles Edgeworth called in? Who could possibly implicate Bickman in this case?? Where did Slackur go?! What is the point of all this dumb foreshadowing?! Find out on December 22nd!
DISCLAIMER: As always, this is a work of fiction. The RF Gen Gang is not guilty of any of this stupid crap.
NOTE: It has come to my attention that no one really likes the idea of my Christmas Stories every year, so this will be the last one. Yes, I am really breaking the tradition. No one likes them anyway. I am only writing this last one to even out the number of them.
Redd: (Silence)
Izret: Uhhh, Redd? Why aren't you preparing for your usual Christmas Story?
Redd: I got nothing this year.
Zagnorch: What?! You always have some crazy tale to tell us! You must have something!
Redd: Not really.
Izret: But...
Redd: And aren't you belittling me every year for telling them, Izret?
Izret: Well, yes, but...It's a tradition!
Bickman: Make one up!
Slackur: Yeah!
Redd: Fine, fine...
Shadow Kisuragi (Shadow): Here we go again.
Redd: Twas the--
(Suddenly, a cloaked figure breaks in through the window, followed by several others)
Shadow: What the...?
Bickman: Who are these guys?
(The cloaked figures remove they're cloaks, revealing...)
Izret: Santa and his elves?!
Zagnorch: What the hell?!
Santa: Ho Ho Ho, you guys have been very naughty!
Redd: Uhhhhhh...what?
Santa: Redd, right? You fought the law and won.
Redd: ......No I didn't.
Santa: And you! (Points to Slackur)
Slackur: What?!
Santa: You kicked the Grinch off his mountain! The ensuing fall broke 16 of his bones!
Bickman: Son of a...I knew that story last year was true!
Slackur: He's lying! The disclaimer even said--
Santa: As for YOU Bickman...
Bickman: You don't have anything on me.
Santa: (Pulls out list) You thief'd a Blue Corvette from some 90s band.
Bickman: I did not!
Santa: And Izret, your wanted for over 100+ Fatalities directed at some guy named...(Glimpses at list) Sub-Zero.
Izret: Oh, come on!
Santa: Zagnorch--
Zagnorch: This should be good...
Santa: Your crime is your existence.
Zagnorch: .........What...the...hell...?
Santa: I'm taking you all to the supreme court!
Redd: No way you greasy old freak! We're staying here!
(Screen flips to reveal the same scene)
Redd: See? We're still here.
Santa: Either you come with me, or you all die here.
(Screen flips to reveal courtroom)
Redd: Ah, crap.
Judge: Court is now in session!
Phoenix Wright: The defense is ready your honor.
Miles Edgeworth: As is the prosecution your honor.
Zagnorch: Redd, I can't help but think this is somehow your fault.
Redd: Me?!
Judge: Silence! Defense, control your clients!
Phoenix: Will you guys shut up?! Not a word! Keep quiet, and I can get you guys out of this!
Redd & Zagnorch: Fine...
Phoenix: Ahem...your honor, these claims against my clients are completely meritless.
Judge: How so?
Phoenix: This piece of evidence proves it! (Pulls out a Laptop and brings up a webpage on the internet) Look at this webpage, your honor.
Judge: This is Santa's Tumblr Blog. It says that your clients did it.
Phoenix: Your honor, you can't believe everything you read on the internet. That's how World War 1 got started.
Bickman: We're screwed...
Izret: Yep...
Will the RF Gen Gang get out of this mess? Will Evil Santa win the day? Did World War 1 get started because of the internet? Will our younger readers get this reference? All this and more on the next part of A Christmas Story 4, coming December 20th!
DISCLAIMER: This is a work of fiction. The only thing the RF Gen Gang is guilty of is loving Video Games.
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