RF Generation Message Board

I really don't feel like I have anyone in my life I can talk to. The few lady friends I've had I usually chase away after I request sex from them (not that I wanted a relationship with them, because personalities clashed but I figured I could try)- my parents I just can't relate to at all, the same goes for the rest of my family. My co-workers I'm kinda the same way with. Any friends that I obtained during school, the military, past jobs, I either went on to different jobs, or moved back home, that sort of thing and just stayed out of contact with.

I'm not depressed, not suicidal, I'm actually relatively happy although sexless and friendless.

I've gotten the usual advice- "go out and meet people" "go to Church" "go to bars" "go whatever place where there's people and just make friends" but for some reason i've just never been able to find anyone I really get along with. I had a circle of friends in the military but we went our ways during permanent change of stations (PCSs). Miss those guys.

Tried reconnecting with some old friends from school but it seems like people just don't give a f***. or theyre married and theyre busy with their life.

anyone in a similar situation?

I know that feel man. Just keep at it, don't come on so strong to the ladies and be thankful you're not actually depressed, trust me on that one.

My love life is a whole nother topic. I was mostly just talking about friends in general. I don't ever see myself "falling in love" whatever the f that means, and that doesn't bother me all that much.

Hey my man, PM me anytime. :)

thats very nice of you. seems like people are pretty friendly here. thats rare on forums.

I've only been here a little over 3 years and this is my go-to site for almost anything. It's like a fraternity around here sans the burden of school. We're always here to help!

I experienced the same situation when I moved back to my home town after years of being in the Army.  Everyone that I previously hung out with in high school had moved away or "popped smoke".  Believe me, this is not a rare occurrence with all the moving around.  It happens to quite a few of us when we leave the military.  We are so used to having buddies constantly around, and ones that would take a bullet for our asses, that the transition can be very difficult.

Where to meet people?  I outgrew the bar scene years ago, when I no longer DJed.  It can be fun, but at some point you have to raise your standards.  If you meet friends/girls in a bar, expect for the relationships to continue in that setting.  It is the same for church.  Are you heavily religious or looking for friends?  In this situation, you should also expect constant future meetings in that setting. 

I recommend that you look to groups that share your interests on Facebook, other social networking sites, Craigslist, the newspaper, etc.  Heck, start your own Facebook group for gaming or whatever else you like.  See who joins you.  You can try adding your profile on internet dating sites.  There are a few that are still free to try out.  Express your interests more at work.  Decorate your workspace and see who comments.  Conversations could ensue.  Purchase a single ticket to local shows you might enjoy whether it be for art, music, food, etc.  Take an extra minute to talk to the people you randomly meet.  Cute cashier?  Lady at the post office?  Walk around the park.  Go to the gym.   And sex before solid relationship is, for many girls, a turn off unless Jeremy Renner is your stunt double.

But more than anything, remember that you have friends on this site.  Need someone to talk to, I'll give you my number if you ask.  Text or call.  I've been there.  

not religious at all, but I like the facebook group idea.

I have a couple friends on facebook who i'd talk to a bit about 10 or 11 years ago but it just seems like they got their own sh*t going now.

I work for a company delivering products and I meet a ton of people. it keeps my social life going but it's mostly older people so it's not like I'm meeting people to hang out with. there's one customer I might ask out next time I see her but I'm worried the dad is going to get mad and either a) call in to the company to complain or b) drop service (she's legal, before anyone asks ;-0

^^^ that's some good advice. I'm apart of a few local Facebook gaming groups. Def fun. I also work at a game store and we do gaming meet up/swap meets every other month to just hang out. You get to meet a lot of people that are into the same thing you are.

I also have gotten some great friends from YouTube. Just watching videos commenting back and doing video responses and what not.


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What branch of service and where were you stationed?

Hey man,

I moved out to Seattle about 9 years ago and I am just now making friends outside of work. It took some hard work from me, because I am not really a going out kind of person at least now that I am 35. I agree check out facebook groups and meetup.com is good to.

Don't forget that your local VFW is a great place to connect, and the Armed Forces Service Center in your area could use your assistance.  What better way to make friends than through helping yourself and others?

It's hard to meet people sometimes isn't it?

If anyone cares- I facebooked my high school crush who I hadn't seen in a decade plus... surprisingly she said she's interested in meeting.

might check out that meetup.com thing, sounds interesting but it also just sounds like a place where people try to f*** eachother haha

It depends on what group you are trying to join. 😊

It didnt work out with the woman I mentioned. She said that she felt I was rushing things too much in terms of wanting a family, marriage, etc, and she is just now coming out of a divorce. she said I was too negative about life and one other thing.

it really stings when you get rejected by a keeper.

Points for trying, I guess.

i mean this in an advice way and not to be hurtful, but if you haven't talked to someone in a decade (or if you only just met someone) don't jump straight to talking about having a family/marriage. that's like the final boss of a relationship, and you've just overwhelmed your potential partner at level 1 with moves they can't handle yet ;) take it slow and try to get to know them better first.

found someone

As opposed to talking about marriage/children first thing, you could be like me and avoid the topic like the plague for 3+ years of dating your girlfriend, until said girlfriend, who is chomping at the bit for the whole ordeal, finally realizes that you have no real desire to ever commit and leaves.

It worked out well in the end, because I found a much more suitable option for me shortly thereafter who isn't nearly as moody or repulsed by my collecting obsession...so...there's that.